Jehova has Minions

I got woke up by churchies this morning. My whiskers thick and unshaven my hair greasy and unmanagable, body naked I wrapped myself in a blanket and answered the door. Two women, one fortyish the other fiftyish. They clucthed the watchtower and a thick leather bound bible. My brain was still slow from the sleep but I did get a grunt out of my mouth. They took that as assent to a convo. They apologized for rousing me from bed and suggested I take a moment to listen to them pitch their God. Well I admired their gumption, these old ladies had stones to invite themselves into a strange naked mans house. I was almost tempted to humour them. It was a trap, let two inside and suddenly you have an infestation of Jehovas. They can smell the ripe unconquered will, they will send two more crusaders and invite four inside and the next thing you know you are hosting bible study shunning festivals for its sin and strapping on a suit and tie to go convert the heathens. "No thank you" I said to the ladies, warily eyeing their watch tower flyers in case they were about to pull the pin and toss the heavy ordinance at me. I guestured towards the large gothic crucifix which adorned the wall behind me " I have faith and Godbless" I purchased that crucifix for just these kinds of scenarios. As a Talisman goes it is very powerful. It will ward off Vampires, Jehova Witness' and all manner of evils. They glanced at my Cross nodded smiled and departed.